The Hair is doing Canada’s north. That just might be the only part of this country where the Hair can find a friendly audience. He took his hairdresser, his wife and his PMO flacks, boarded his jet and headed for Whitehorse, Yukon. Only in front of a friendly audience of what were Certified Conservative Supporters did he announce his intent to run again in 2015.
The Hair also used that dread word “prorogue.” Where in the past prime ministers have used a few days or at most a week or so of prorogation to prepare for a throne speech and a new session of parliament, Harper’s Hair takes the time for an extended holiday from the quibbling of his parliamentary opponents. He considers democracy such a spot of bother, you know.
But in front of this friendly Conservative audience who might not have heard much about the Canadian Senate, the Hair could be positive and confident. He told these quiet people that once again, he intends to run on his magnificent management of Canada’s economy and all the jobs he has created for Canadians in their new Target stores. And, we should not forget those wonderful high-paying jobs he created for the elite in the Senate!
The Hair might have disappointed his audience as to when he expects to have an environmental policy to do something about the tar sands people who are trashing northern Alberta. It would also be helpful in the north as his government promotes less restricted mining to try to balance the costs of assisting people trying to live above the frost line. He did announce that his government is going to train the local people to work in the mines instead of their traditional seal hunts. Those mining skills might not really pay off when the mines are played out.
Yet it was the Hair itself that was the big surprise for everybody. For the first time in quite a while, Canadians were seeing the Hair in better balance with the Prime Minister’s fringe. The new piece has more white in it and it blends better. It actually makes the Prime Minister look more distinguished—if not older. After all it would never do for the Prime Minister to have the sun glinting off his dome on those long days of August in the far north.
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Copyright 2013 © Peter Lowry
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